AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
