I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Randomize
