Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
