I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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