There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
My bed smells like the plague
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
