What a fucking waste of an outfit
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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