I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Randomize
