Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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