I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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