What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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