We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Less talking, more tequila
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
