addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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