whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
