Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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