Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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