another moral hangover. fuck.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
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