the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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