They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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