The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
