If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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