Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize