Fuck appropriateness.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
