exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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