NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
