I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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