Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize