lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
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