wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I think my vagina is haunted
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
