how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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