I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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