We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
