Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Randomize
