Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
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