I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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