She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Randomize
