just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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