More tranny stories later!
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
