summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
