i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I think i peed on brittanys purse
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
