just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
she pinky promised me she was 18
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
