He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
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