don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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