My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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