OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
