I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
