Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I am spending my child support on dildos
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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