ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
