We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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