We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
She's just so happy...and so naked.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Randomize
