What a fucking waste of an outfit
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
