So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
how do flat chested girls get laid?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
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