Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
