Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
be right there i have to get my cape
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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